as soon as I pass the threshold
my knees press hard and deep into dirt and rocks
hands clasped together
shivering violently
God I don't know how to pray
but please get him away from me
his chip is still on my shoulder
his stench still strong in my nostrils
I can hear his memory calling my name behind me
and I'm trembling off of my knees
and into a run
tears flowing like rivers again
I'm trying to keep my head above the waters
but I feel him growing closer and closer
my natural instinct is to turn to him and embrace him
run into his arms like a child to its mother
because they were the only things
that once made me feel safe
but my ribs are still bruised from the last lashings
and if he touches them I swear they'll fall apart
I keep running
but he's always just a step behind me
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