Jada's Honest Poem

Hi, my name is Jada
In Hebrew that means wise, but I will believe almost anything
I was born on the 22nd of January--dead of winter,
how ironic it is that I am probably one of the warmest people you will ever meet
I am only 4'11, but I swear I am much bigger than that
I just don't want people to believe they can take advantage of me
Because small often times means weak
I don't know how to swim, which probably explains why
I find myself drowning in my own tears often
And I have a weakness for a guy who makes me drunk off of his play on words 
I'm still learning how to be sober
Because I fall for words from false lips
And often am too afraid to hear any truths
I was born a twin, and I've been afraid of lonely ever since
I like watching The Perks of Being a Wallflower
It comforts me in knowing that people just like me exist
We see things, we keep quiet about them, and we understand.
We are wallflowers.
I've been told I trust too easily,
That I always see the good in every single person I meet,
Ignore the bad signs,
And then become surprised when they do me wrong
I get really nervous when someone tells me how beautiful I am
It's not that I never thought so; 
I just didn't think anyone ever noticed me
I have an odd fascination with trees and lying in grass
They remind me of the first time I fell in love
And I feel him there whenever I'm in the presence of either
I guess that's why I have attachment issues 
I know it sounds crazy but it reminds me that I'm not afraid to get close to people
But I am scared to death when things stop going well and I may lose someone
Someone I have deemed as an important character in my story
I'm very clumsy
One day I tripped over my insecurities 
Landed on my self-esteem
And it shattered like a fallen mirror
And has never been right ever since
I've never liked taking risks
But I have this red badge of courage that makes me go after things that may hurt me
I wonder what my walls say about me when I'm not around
I go in my room 
Close my door
Undress my armor
And lie in my truth
But I don't tell it as much as I should
My name is Jada
I am a small person with a big voice and a big heart
I am a walking contradiction
I enjoy playing with animals, waking up late, and laughing until I cry
I have a solar-powered smile
And a battery-operated confidence
My hobbies currently include:
Editing my imperfections
Hiding behind my pen
And trying to convince my heart that it's not in love with the wrong person
I don't know much but I do know this:
That I am destined to write the wrongs of this world
And I know that one day somebody will love my scars
Just as much as I love theirs